BLOODFIRE 46: UNDEAD

A weekend or two after Dead of Winter, a clubmate struggled the 0.7 miles to my house and we threw a couple games down, along with quite a few beers. First game saw me messing with 1995 points of Abyssals, in what I’m pretty sure is my first game with the faction? I may hold on to the report for that game, due to loathesome proxies on my part. More importantly, I busted out Bloodfire after grabbing dinner and we threw down a second facesmasher of a match. Strap in.

Salamanders 1995
Fire Elementals Horde
Fire Elementals Horde
Fire Elementals Horde
Fire Elementals Horde
Ember Sprites Regiment
Ember Sprites Regiment
Ember Sprites Regiment
Ember Sprites Regiment
Greater Fire Elemental

Clan Lord – Axe of the Giant Slayer, Raptor
Clan Lord – Torc of Dissonance, Raptor
Mage-Priest – Crown of the Wizard King, Fireball (10), Surge (8), Host Shadowbeast (8)
Battle Captain on Rhinosaur – Inspiring Talisman

Canny readers will notice that this is the Shadowbeast version of the last time I played Bloodfire, with the Torc on one Raptor Lord because it seems good to have around and you can pop it in the shooting phase while eating somebody’s face in the combat phase. I was pumped to give the list – and Host Shadowbeast – a shot.

Undead 1995
Werewolves Horde – Brew of Strength
Wights Horde
Wights Horde
Revenants Horde – Sanguinary Scripture, Undead Giant Rats
Zombies Horde
Wraiths Troop
Wraiths Troop
Goreblight

Vampire Lord on Undead Dragon – Icy Breath (10), Surge (8), Lightning Bolt (4)
Necromancer – Inspiring Talisman, Surge (6), Drain Life (4)

This is more or less his 2300 cut down because I asked him to make a 1995 😐 He’s really down on the dragon (I AGREE) but the vampires he’s churning out for the next version of the army aren’t done yet, 335 point sink it is. The Wraiths are the newest addition, which he’s loving. I’ve fought them plenty of times in other Undead armies and continue to be surprised at how just good they are!

We rolled up Raze, and I won and took first turn, because shambling.

BATTLE

Salamanders 0: Scouting phase!
Salamanders 1: The red wall churns forward, promising violence. The Raptor Lord with the torc is positioned centrally.
Undead 1: The deadites likewise shamble forward, with the exception being the Werewolves shooting hard to the right flank. The Necromancer and Vampire Lord attempt to slingshot the Goreblight forward with double surges but they fail quite terribly.
Salamanders 2: Whelp, no time like the present for smashing stuff :/ Ember Sprites scramble out of the way on the left, with one regiment sizzling through the central pond into the flank of the right Wight horde. Double Fire Elementals storm into the stranded Goreblight, as the Rhino Captain hits left Wraiths and prepares to block the infantry hordes up, the torc Raptor Lord charges the left Wights (to sit them down), and the Greater Fire Elemental and slayer Raptor Lord join those cheeky Ember Sprites on the right Wights. The red right flank churns forward, watching for wolves.
Shooting kicks off with the torc Raptor Lord shattering his Torc of Dissonance, turning off the Vampire Lord’s surge 😤 Then the Mage-Priest powers that Raptor Lord up with +5 attaks. Feels good. Ember Sprites stick 2 damage on the Zombie horde, but the two regiments on the right can’t get any damage to stick to the Wraiths near them. The warm liquid goo phase sees the Goreblight immolate completely, and the right Wight horde evaporates. The Rhino Captain punches his Wraiths for 2 damage, however it looks like the 10 attak Raptor Lord fails to even disorder his Wight horde. Feels, uh, bad.
Undead 2: Thankfully with the Vampire Lord’s surge turned off this turn, the nimble-less Wights struggle to spot any flanks they can capitalize on with the Necromancer’s piddly 17″ surging range and height 2 (and of course I’ve got surge waiting if he jumps my lines). The Wights end up combo-charging the leftmost Fire Elemental horde, opening up the Rhino Captain to be charged by the Zombies (hindered). The Wraiths on the right struggle with how to be useful, deciding to charge the Raptor Lord protecting the Greater Fire Elemental’s rear on the odd change they can overrun and ruin her day. The dragon rotates in place, preparing to use its icy breath on the torc Raptor Lord. The Werewolves abandon the flank and return to their starting position 😛
The Vampire coats the torc Raptor Lord in ice, causing no damage but freezing the tough lizard (I missed that Frozen procs on damage, like most all of KOW, and just applied it on hit, for all it matters). The Necromancer attempts to drain life the Rhino Captain, but likewise can’t manage both hitting and wounding. In combat, the left ghost squad is far more competent, smashing the leftmost Fire Elemental horde into embers and preparing for retribution. The Zombies scrabble 2 damage into the Rhino Captain, despite needing 6s then 5s, and the right Wraiths bad touch 3 damage onto the slayer Raptor Lord.
Salamanders 3: I windmill slam the Greater Fire Elemental into the Wight’s flank, with Fire Elementals in the front. Almost as fast, the torc Raptor Lord jumps on the Vampire Lord on Undead Dragon, a Fire Elemental horde plows into the flank of the right Wraiths with the slayer Raptor Lord in the front. And grudgingly the Rhino Captain counter-charges the Zombies. Ember Sprites skitter around …
… and spit a single damage onto the Revenant horde. The Mage-Priest pumps +3 attaks into the slayer Raptor Lord, who revs up and, with the help of the Fire Elemental flank, nukes those right Wraiths. Speaking of applying heat to ghosts, the Greater Fire and more Fire Elementals obliterate the Wight horde. The Rhino Captain pulverizes a few Zombies, and the torc Raptor Lord sits the dragon down (on 2 damage). I burn 2 tokens, starting the scoring off 2-0.
Undead 3: Lots of finagling results in the Revenant horde indeed being trapped behind the Zombies; they side step in a bid to become relevant. The Vampire Lord lopes into the left Fire Elementals, shortly before Wraiths nimble over to the horde’s flank and get surged 1″ in by the Necromancer. The Werewolves turn tail and head back to down the right flank.
The Vampire Lord and Wraiths push the Fire Elementals to 11 damage, but they hold. The Zombies preposterously push the Rhino Captain to 7 damage, tho he also holds firm.
Salamanders 4: The Greater Fire Elemental once again immediately propels itself into a tasty flank, with the Vampire Lord feeling her gentle caress this time. The Fire Elementals team up by hitting the dragon’s front. The torc Raptor Lord lunges at the Necromancer (hindered), the Rhino Captain counters the Zombies again, and a crack team of Ember Sprites, Fire Elementals and slayer Raptor Lord move to intercept the Werewolves.
The Mage-Priest whips +2 attaks onto the torc Raptor Lord – the Wizard Crown is amazing, y’all. That Mage-Priest has hardly moved from that pond, when in the past she’d be furiously moving 5″ every turn and taking the support shots she could get. In other shooting, Ember Sprites tickle the Revenants up to 3 damage and do 1 damage to the Werewolves. Combat begins with the dragon getting dunked by the Greater Fire and friends. The Necromancer is wavered and more Zombies die.
Undead 4: The Wraiths charge the badly mauled Fire Elementals, while Revenants back up and the Werewolves dive further down the flank, disappearing up and over the right hill.
The Wraiths finish off the Fire Elementals, backing up and burning a point (now 2-1). Then the Zombies somehow tear down the Rhino Captain, messily devouring him … and turning their rear to the Greater Fire Elemental in a show of disrespect.
Salamanders 5: I hesitate but a moment before hammering the GFE into the Zombies’ rear. Fresh Fire Elementals power into those Wraiths, and the slayer Raptor Lord pressures the Werewolves into engaging sooner than later. The torc Raptor Lord charges the Revenant horde to hold them in place (not shown above). He gets another +2 attaks from the Mage-Priest’s horse firebeast.
The smell of sizzling flesh pervades the battlefield as the Necromancer is cooked by Ember Sprites, before the Greater Fire Elemental wades into the Zombie horde and it gets so much worse. They incinerate, and the Fire Elementals happily drive off the last of the Wraiths. The torc Raptor Lord chomps the Revenants up to 8 damage. I burn my third token (3-1).
Undead 5: The Werewolves turn to face the elite fire team descending upon them. The Revenants counter-charge the Raptor Lord, doing 2 damage and lifeleaching down to 6 themselves.
Salamanders 6: The Revenant horde is mobbed by Ember Sprites as the Greater Fire Elemental wades to support the torc Raptor Lord. The Werewolves meanwhile are charged by the slayer Raptor Lord.

The Revenants are demolished, thanks in large part to the GFE doing 7-8 damage on 8 attaks. While the Werewolves don’t take appreciable damage from the Raptor Lord, the Undead concede as the wolves can at best drop the Raptor Lord, and very likely get wrecked in Turn 7 by Fire Elementals no matter what they do. With 4 points to the Undead’s 1, that’s a convincing …

BLOODFIRE VICTORY

Though it felt a little bad styling on my clubmate so thoroughly, it’s always fun to slam Bloodfire into armies that also want to fight. I’m really enjoying the double Raptor Lords, and Shadowbeast, while not particularly game-breaking on Clan Lords (especially when you consider what the Mage-Priest costs!), is a lot of fun. Crown of the Wizard King is particularly wonderful on a short support caster whose best surge targets (Greater Fire Elementals) are taller than everything around her.

SCUTTLIN’ REALM 25: SALAMANDERS

Last game of the tournament and I’m up against Justin, a real gent who’s had the same mixed bag of games that I have. He’s rocking a pure Mantic army that I think was designed to proxy as different armies, but might just be made from various Mantic kits that were available to pull together into one reptilian facebreaker of an army. Without further ado:

Salamanders 2100
Tyrants Horde – Brew of Sharpness, Effigy of Fire
Tyrants Horde – Potion of the Caterpillar, Effigy of Fire
Tyrants Horde – Boots of Striding, Effigy of Fire
Rhinosaur Cavalry Regiment
Rhinosaur Cavalry Regiment
Ghekkotah Warriors Troop
Ghekkotah Warriors Troop
Greater Fire Elemental – Fireball (8)
Greater Fire Elemental – Fireball (8)

Rakawas, The Pale Rider
Mage-Priest – Sacred Horn, Surge (8), Veil of Shadows (3)
Artakl

As a player of a facebreaker Salamander army, I can respect it. Tyrants with fixer items, both thicc and true chaff, double oh-so-satisfying Me3+ GFEs and a Priest to shove them into flanks, and two baller living legends. Apparently he had brought Veil to deal with all the Elves and kin in the meta, but had had the good fortune of not playing any shooting army until my crabs. (For the record, Twilight and Sylvan Kin had quickly stormed up the tables and had been scrumming up there with Jason’s Nightstalkers in the mix.)

Final scenario is good ol’ Dominate, and he goes first probably because I made him. Justin is a smart player and I doubt he’d miss the opportunity to leave my shooting out to dry for a turn.

BATTLE: GAME 5

Battlelines! Artakl is that little green model way out on the right flank. I don’t have a strong answer to her but I figure the Eternal is a good fixer of problems?
Salamanders 1: The death blob slowly rolls forward, with his first cast of Veil of Shadows this tournament ironically failing on three dice 😐 Artakl stays out of the Eternal’s charge range and sticks 3 damage into the non-regenerating crab-person.
Trident 1: The crustacean crescent bows around the Sallies, with Kraken on either end threatening to jump on any flanks. The Eternal advances but keeps Artakl in his LOS at least for now. Heartpiercers stick 3 damage on the sharpness Tyrants in the middle and the right Rhinosaurs.
Salamanders 2: The reptilian deathstar rumbles forward, making a space for Rakawas at its core. Veil of Shadows fails a second time on three dice (!), and Artakl dodges the Eternal’s LOS and pops another damage on him.
Trident 2: I see the opportunity to either trap him behind his H4 Rhino chaff or kill them and keep the rest of the deathball in the front, so the Krakens are released into both Rhinosaur regiments. The right Rhinos are comboed by some Placoderms as well (hindered), and on the left I try to jam the Greater Fire Elemental from flanking the left Kraken. All the other crabs jockey for shots or relevance in later turns, including the Eternal who gives up on Artakl and just pushes back to the action.
Heartpiercers and the Centurion pound the sharpness Tyrants up to 9 damage. In combat, the right Kraken and Placos wreck their Rhinosaurs, but the left Kraken fluffs a single damage on his Rhinos. At least they’re in the way?
Salamanders 3: Despite packing nearly our entire armies into the dominate circle, a surprising amount of movement and counter-punch happens. First, a Ghekkotah troop gets out of the way by charging Heartpiercers peaking over the hill. Shortly after, Rakawas thunders into my Centurion posing on the hill, a GFE and pathfinder Tyrants hit the right Placoderms, and the surviving Rhinosaurs sidestep, making space for the other GFE to flank the left Kraken. Oof.
Kings of Hills: The Final Chapter
The Mage-Priest finally puts up Veil of Shadows! And Artakl blowdarts the Eternal up to 7 damage 😐

Once all the roaring of the combat phase dies down, the Placoderms are dead but otherwise the crabs hold tight. The flanking GFE does 9(?) damage to the left Kraken, Rakawas chomps a hearty 6 into the ensnaring Centurion, and the cheeky Ghekkos do 2 to the Heartpiercers and waver them. Well played, tiny garbage lizards.

Trident 3: Crabs pile on Rakawas, with Placoderms and Water Elementals joining the Centurion in his efforts to drop the rex. The right Kraken hits the pathfinder Tyrants, and after tons of thought the left Kraken front charges the wounded Rhinosaurs gambling on popping them and reforming. The Eternal threatens from the woods and the left Heartpiercers (and war-bow!) grab a bead on the sharpness Tyrants in the back.
Despite stealthy and cover, I manage to drop those sharpness Tyrants! And grudgingly put 1 damage on the right GFE, for lack of another target. In combat, the left Kraken does pop the Rhinosaurs, turning to face the GFE and strider Tyrants to his left, Rakawas goes up to 12 damage but holds firm, and the right Kraken does a meager 4 damage to the pathfinder Tyrants.
Salamanders 4: Crabs brace for the Sallies’ left hook, and boy is it a doozie. Strider Tyrants charge the left Kraken, with a Greater Fire surged into his flank. Rakawas counters the Water Elementals, with a Greater Fire comboing in the front. Pathfinder Tyrants counter the right Kraken, Ghekkos re-charge their Heartpiercers (off the hill!), and more Ghekkos take on the Eternal in the wood. Oh, and Artakl jumps on the bastion Envoy over by the right Kraken.
In combat, Rakawas and the GFE savage the Water Elemental horde, one rounding it and turning to face the tiny crabs surrounding them. The left Kraken likewise is burned down by the GFE hitting its flank a second time (the Tyrants helped, even on 5+ to hit), while the right Kraken lucky wavers on a mere 8 damage. The Ghekkos fighting Heartpiercers somehow waver them again (on 5 damage), while the Eternal takes no damage and somehow Artakl fails to wound the bastion Envoy. [I’m quite sure we forgot she has duellist – I certainly didn’t know that until reading the unit entry right now!]
Trident 4: Wheeew we be grinding, and I feel like I’m gradually losing the grind here, but I do have a lot of guns. Placoderms charge the left GFE to hopefully contain it, while three units of Heartpiercers point their harpoon guns at the titanic dinosaur on the hill. The Centurion jukes around the t-rex to silence the Mage-Priest, while the Eternal counter-charges his Ghekkos and the Kraken rapidly regenerates (down to 2 damage), enjoying bastion as well.
Rakawas is pincushioned up to snake eyes and blessedly expires. So effective is the Heartpiercer shooting that some extra damage is splashed on the Tyrants menacing the wavered Kraken, pushing them to 10 total. The Centurion is also able to spike 1 damage into the Mage-Priest, disordering her. In combat, the Placoderms and Eternal do token damage to the GFE (4) and Ghekkos (2) respectively.
Salamanders 5: Listen, Justin is real good with Greater Fire Elementals, ok? The Placo’s GFE joins the other in a combo-charge on Heartpiercers to the right, as strider Tyrants hit the left Heartpiercers, Ghekkos re-re-charge their Heartpiercers (off the hill again!), pathfinder Tyrants re-charge the Kraken with the Mage-Priest in the front and Artakl in the flank, and Ghekkos in the woods counter the Eternal.
The Greater Fire Elementals shatter their Heartpiercers, turning or overrunning to menace the little bit left of the Scuttlin’ Realm. Speaking of Heartpiercer death, that troop of Ghekkotah Warriors preposterously kill their Heartpiercer regiment this turn, also turning to face the besieged Placoderms; and the strider Tyrants pound 9 damage into the left Heartpiercers, somehow only wavering them. In the Kraken combat, the Tyrants push the giant crab up to 12 damage, and it wavers with the 13th damage from the Mage-Priest 👏 The Eternal takes no damage from his Ghekkos.
Trident 5: In yet another fight-for-your-life situation, the Placoderms charge off the hill into the flank of the strider Tyrants. They’ve got some help from the Centurion, who charges the GFE staring at their rear to block its charge options next turn. Also the Eternal counters those Ghekkos and the last functioning Heartpiercers prepare to end another badly mauled Tyrant unit. The Kraken, naturally, rapidly regenerates (back to 6).
Those Heartpiercers do end the pathfinder Tyrants, having done far more damage than the badly shook Kraken could. The Eternal also ends the annoying Ghekkos in the wood, turning to face the mayhem. And despite a very respectably 9 damage, the strider Tyrants hold, leaving the Placoderm’s rear out in the wind – tho the Centurion does chunk a couple damage into the GFE eyeing them.
Salamanders 6: We do a quick scenario check – I’ve got 9 US vs his 6, but he’s still got a few hammers left in his bag. Tyrants hit the left Heartpiercers, Ghekkos rear charge the Placoderms (technically off the hill!), and the right GFE charges the other Heartpiercers. The other GFE sidesteps and prepares for a 5-6″ surge into the Placoderm flank …
… which falls 1″ short, praise be to the gods of the deep! Artakl does however finish off the Eternal she started all those turns ago. In combat, the Tyrants likewise finish off their Heartpiercers, Those murderous Ghekkos, having gotten a taste of crab mean, do 6 damage (!) to the Placoderms, while to the right the GFE pounds 6 into the last of the Heartpiercers, wavering them.
Trident 6: It’s 6 US to 6 US, but I’ve got plenty to capitalize on. Placoderms charge the heavily damaged strider Tyrants, as the Kraken rips into the rear of a Greater Fire Elemental (on 3 damage). The Centurion prepares to disorder the Mage-Priest again.
Which he does, praise be to the trident (tho he could have charged her anyway :P) The Placoderms tear the strider Tyrants asunder, turning to face the Ghekkotah menace … and I guess the GFE as well because I can’t roll Nv tests to save my life this tournament. The Kraken mashes the towering fire monster to 12 damage (15-16 would have been average) but I can’t roll the 6 needed twice. But you know, it doesn’t matter because with 6 US to 3, this is a solid …
Salamanders 7: The left GFE front charges the Placoderms alongside the Ghekkotahs (off the hill again! which I forgot phalanx turns off), with Mage-Priest in the flank. The other GFE hits the Heartpiercers again (3 damage) with Artakl in the flank.
The sound of roasting crabs can be heard as both units crumble.
Trident 7: Well, it’s now 3 to 1 and I’m pushing for a draw. The Kraken scoots past the GFE into the Ghekkotahs while the Centurion prepares to finish it off.
Thankfully both likely events happen, leaving us with one scoring monster and a few individuals each, for a hard fought …

DRAW (10-10)

We came within 70 points on attrition as well, so just about a down the line draw. Which was a happy end to a smasher of a game – I gave Justin my bests sports, as he really was a gent and knew his rules super well (apart from Artakl’s duelist maybe). This was also a fine close to the tournament. Going 2-2-1 is absolutely cool in my book, playing a selection of armies is even better, with no repeats and just the one Elf. I did get dumpstered on paint yet again, which sucks when the army was a bear to paint and always gets such a good reception from other players, but I was given some pointers on adding pop to the army, which I’ve taken to heart and will be trying to do before the crabs roll out again … which might be sooner than you think 😉

I was pretty down on Trident Realm after the event, and had a good talk with another NE regular about the faction’s struggle to play the meta. As he put it, they’re a finesse army playing in a game that increasingly isn’t about finesse. Our hammers are the anvils of other armies, which totally checks out when you look at what Kraken are good at (spoiler: it isn’t really killing) and how my strongest hammer is a juiced up Water Elemental horde.

All the same, I enjoyed the bag of tools feel to the army, loved the Centurion with the trident, and continue to enjoy the scenario-minded shooting of the Heartpiercer regiments. Placoderms were fine, but they could really use anything else. Vicious would be great but I’d be happy with fury – I hear the Envoy has a fury aura?? Hmm …

Anyway, thanks for reading! I’ve got a couple more random facesmasher games to report on post-tournament, so stay tuned.

SCUTTLIN’ REALM 24: BASILEANS

Sunday morning and I’m the least hungover I’ve ever been on the second day of a tournament, which is a good thing because I’ve got some work ahead of me. I’m matched up against Chris, a good player with a smart, aggressive army (and one of my favorites kicking around the Northeast – I’m a sucker for a Kings of Warmachine armies, even if his is sharing the bill with Warhammer minis :P) In my head I’ve already lost, but getting 6 points would be rad, maybe even a draw with some luck??

Basileans 2100
Elohi Horde – Brew of Strength
Elohi Horde – Helm of the Drunken Ram
Ogre Palace Guard Horde – Chalice of Wrath
Ogre Palace Guard Horde – Dwarven Ale
Men-at-Arms Spearmen Horde
Gur Panthers Troop
Gur Panthers Troop

High Paladin on Dragon – Aegis Fragment
Samacris, Mother of Phoenixes – Fireball (8), Heal (5)
Dictator – Iron Discipline, Lute of Insatiable Darkness

An anemic 10 drops but packed with some serious beef. Flying elite hammers are my kryptonite, especially in such volume, and he’s also rocking one of the other mega dragons of the game. Blessedly no longer fearless but demanding of respect to be sure.

Fourth scenario is Raze, which happily I was able to practice with my crabs before the tournament. He went first, either by choice or because I made him.

BATTLE: GAME 4

Battlelines! The Depth Horror Eternal is hard left, inspiring the Kraken and aiming to contest the third Basilean token, which is also hard left.
Basileans 1: The angelic host sidles forward, staying out of saucy Kraken charges but angling for flanks and generalized violence. The headstrong Palace Guard do toe into the central woods.
Trident 1: The crabs do a menace, with the Eternal pressuring the Panthers off his leftmost token, the left Kraken threatening a play for the other left token, and the Water Elementals and right Kraken watching their flanks but glowering at the Basilean anvils and right hook. Heartpiercers stick 1 damage on the headstrong Palace Guard and 3 on the right drunken ram Elohi (after iron resolves), while the Centurion tags the HPOD for 2 damage, reduced to 0 with the aegis frament but still disordering her. Bastion on the left Placoderms fails.
Basileans 2: Chris knows that he’s got plenty of time to burn his objectives, and he knows my shooting is the biggest potential threat to his ability to burn objectives late game, so all the Heartpiercers receive angelic attention. Strength Elohi, Samacris, drunken Elohi and the High Paladin slam into my tiny shooty crabs across the board. The heavy center trudges forward and the left Panthers get away from their crabby oppressors.
Both Elohi drive off their Heartpiercers, as Sammy shuts hers down (2 damage) and the High Paladin struggles but manages to waver her unit (~5 damage).
Trident 2: I try to rest the momentum back from the angels by driving hard into the Basilean anvils: Placoderms and Water Elementals hit the headstrong Palace Guard, and the right Kraken begins grinding the Men-at-Arms since he couldn’t triple the Palace Guard but also somebody’s gotta. In order for this to work, I need to ground those Elohi units, so Sammy’s Heartpiercers corkscrew the strength horde and the other Placoderms scuttle into the drunken horde. The Kraken on the left looms, while the Eternal rounds the house on the left.
Bastion fails on the Water Elementals, but the Centurion does disorder the dragon with his laser trident (1 damage sticks too). In combat, the headstrong Palace Guard waver on 9 damage, the Kraken chunks 5 damage into the Men-at-Arms, and thankfully the Heartpiercers and Placoderms do sit both Elohi down. Wheeeew.
Behold, the fury of the lowly crab unleashed!
Basilean 3: The next turn starts with the headstrong Palace Guard failing their headstrong test 🦀 The fury Palace Guard flank the Placoderms (off the hill for maximum shell-cracking power) but the Water Elementals are safe to swing again. The Men-at-Arms counter the Kraken, the Elohi counter their annoying disorder buddies, and the High Paladin charges her Heartpiercers again. Sammy flits over to heal the Men-at-Arms, who are also iron disciplined by the Dictator. And the left Gur Panthers nimble around to burn a token once the Kraken leaves, walk forward and burn another the following turn.
The strength Elohi dunk their Heartpiercers, spinning to face the Kraken looming to the left. The central Placoderms are shattered by the fury Palace Guard, who overrun to touch the Water Elementals’ flank. The Men-at-Arms stab a ferocious 10 damage into their Kraken, the High Paladin wavers her Heartpiercers with 10 damage, and the drunken Elohi do a mere 1 damage to their Placoderms. Sammy burns a token, starting the scoring.
Trident 3: I unleash the left Kraken into the strength Elohi (on 1 damage), charge the Water Elemental horde into the headstrong Palace Guard to fight for its life, the Kraken back into the Men-at-Arms, and the Placoderms back into the Elohi for another grounding if not murder. The Eternal books it for my leftmost token.
Bastion goes up on the Water Elementals, shortly before they rout the headstrong Palace Guard and turn to face the fury Palace Guard. The right Kraken lucky wavers the Men-at-Arms on 9 damage, while the left Kraken can only get the strength Elohi to 4 damage. On the right, the Centurion tridents the High Paladin again, keeping her sat down (and on 2 damage), and the Placoderms at least disorder the drunken Elohi [can’t see the damage die]. The Eternal burns a token, tying the score 1-1.
Basilean 4: The angelic host strikes with a vengeance, fury Palace Guard assaulting the Water Elementals (hindered) with Gur Panthers in the flank (hindered). Strength Elohi counter their Kraken, as right flank of angels large and small strike once more at the crustacean uprising.
Samacris heals 2 damage from the Men-at-Arms shortly before crab blood is spilled hither and yon. The strength Elohi one round a fresh 17/19 Kraken despite ensnare (hot Nv roll and no inspiring helps), and the Palace Guard and Panther combo similarly one rounds the -/18 Water Elemental horde in the woods. The drunken Elohi enjoy some of that luck, wavering their Placoderms on 4 damage, but the High Paladin laughably can only get her Hearpiercers to 8 damage, failing to waver them this time. The left Panthers burn a token, bringing the score to 2-1.
Trident 4: I’m skirting by on the skin of my mandibles at this point, but maybe all’s not totally lost? The Eternal pushes for the middle, mostly to distract the strength Elohi / threaten the anvils if he’s not dealt with. The Centurion moves to disorder the drunken Elohi this turn, hoping beyond hope that the plucky Heartpiercers can disorder the High Paladin themselves. And the Kraken revs up and prepares to fight for his life – plus, if he can pop the Men-at-Arms, he can a) turn to face his oppressors, for a -2 to hit in the woods and b) back up next turn and score another point for the Realm, for a higher scoring loss.
The Centurion disorders the drunken Elohi and the Heartpiercers do the 1 damage to keep the High Paladn on mega dragon pinned in place. Yowza. In the Kraken fight, the big guy shoves the Men-at-Arms to 16 damage but the rerolled 6 to rout eludes me and the horde just wavers. I despair a bit, as I’ve spent a lot of the tournament failing very low rout rolls, but life goes on … until next turn anyway!
Basilean 5: The fury Palace Guard plow into the Kraken’s flank (hindered), the central Elohi swoop down upon the Eternal, the drunken Elohi hit those Placoderm again, and the High Paladin spends a fourth turn fighting the same unit of rapidly regenerating Heartpiercers 😀
Sammy heals 2 damage on the central Elohi, moments before they don’t kill the Eternal (5 damage). The Kraken however instantly crumbles to the fury Palace Guard, as was pretty likely. Both the Placoderms and Heartpiercers in the bottom right just waver 😉 Also the Gur Panthers far left score a third token (3-1).
Trident 5: With the bottom right wavered out and the game drawing to a close, the Centurion voyages out to finish off the Men-at-Arms horde. Envoy scoot about and the Eternal counters the strength Elohi on the hill.
A clap of thunder fills the gaming hall as the Trident of the Drowned Sea strikes the Men-at-Arms from the table! Also the Eternal fails to wound his Elohi.
Basilean 6: The angels finish off the Eternal and finally drive off the crabs in the bottom right. Golf clap for those two regiments’ service to the cause. The fury Palace Guard turn about to, I think, deter the Centurion from getting froggy with the drunken Elohi if there’s a Turn 7.
Trident 6: Envoys scatter and the Centurion does indeed get froggy with the drunken Elohi. The trident doesn’t claim another victim, sadly, but the heroic crustacean does receive bastion in case there’s more pain coming.
Basilean 7: The fury Palace Guard plow into the ensnaring Centurion, the drunken Elohi into the bastion Envoy, and the High Paladin prepares to breath on the war-bow Envoy.
Come get some!
Shockingly, no crab dies this turn, with all my individuals copping 5 damage each.
Trident 7: I give the war-bow Envoy and the Centurion a chance at glory each, but neither the drunken Elohi (5 damage) or the High Paladin on Dragon (2 damage) miraculously go down. With a score of 4-1, that’s a decisive …

BASILEAN VICTORY (3-18)

Wheeeew, what a match. I was a little frustrated, as I tried so hard and came close to getting the 6-15 I had set out for, but looking back it’s pretty clear that I got my fair share of breaks when a significant part of his army was mired in my deployment zone for the entire game. Thinking about it, terrain was pretty important for me getting so little use out of my shooters, along with savvy target selection from him and poor counter assault setup by me. I’m impressed it was as much of a match as it was, tho it was certainly a joy to play Chris, a player I may never have played but seen out plenty.

UP NEXT: Salamanders!

SCUTTLIN’ REALM 23: NIGHTSTALKERS

End of day one and I’ve clubbed my way up to one of the higher tables, despite my expectations. I’m up against my clubmate Jason, who wasn’t signed up until his wife made him the night before. He’s rocking his Nightstalkers army from 2019, which coincidentally is possibly the last time he’s played. Nice.

Nightstalkers 2100
Fiends Horde – Potion of the Caterpillar
Butchers Horde
Butchers Horde
Spectres Horde
Phantoms Troop
Phantoms Troop
Terror
Shadow-Hulk
Planar Apparition – Icy Breath (8), Heal (7), Mind Fog (2)
Mind-Screech – Lightning Bolt (6), Mind Fog (6), Wind Blast (6)

Dread-Fiend
Horror – Lightning Bolt (3), Bane Chant (2)

This is actually 10 points under and I can’t confirm that his Horror has bane chant, but it would make sense to take it. I know the Planar Apparition has icy breath, since he commented about giving it even more spells despite coming with some serious ones already. If somebody has an item, he didn’t put a slip out for it like he did for Maccwar’s, so I’m guessing there might be some forgettable 5 pointers he filled with? Anyway, check out that horde of Spectres! That apparently had been doing work despite being a junk unit he chose for unlock purposes.

Third scenario is Loot, with him going first either by choice or because I made him.

BATTLE: GAME 3

Battlelines! The ghostly thing is the Planar Apparition, snake girls on the left are Fiends of various sizes. I’ll admit that I immediately felt like I really misdeployed those Heartpiercers on the left. They were sort of a bait drop but with the heal and the Fiends’ speed and stealthy, they were unlikely to do anything of note beyond die. At least the Depth Horror Eternal could make a solid delaying act or even hack his way to the loot with the power of ensnare.
Nightstalkers 1: The shadowy horrors shove up the field, especially on the left unopposed field. I’m terrified of the Me 3+ Shadow-Hulk with its new slayer (D6), and my general approach to Terrors is to never touch them at all ever beyond delaying them or grabbing a lucky flank. So consider me shook. His Phantoms do advance just a smidge too far, and toe the woods in the middle … The Horror lightnings the rightmost Heartpiercers for 1 damage.
Trident 1: Release the Kraken! I burn clock deciding how little my shooting is going to do on 5 or 6+ at best, confirm that the Phantoms are in, and punch it way too early. Bastion goes up on the central Kraken and I can’t guarantee that the right Kraken is even inspired.
But after rampaging those Phantoms I think he is on the rotate. The central Kraken pounds 7 damage into his Phantoms but fails the double 5 rout. Heartpiercers put 6 damage into the Spectres and 1 into the right Butchers.
Nightstalkers 2: The living nightmares descend, with Fiends already hitting those left Heartpiercers and Butchers joining the dance with the right Kraken. Phantoms counter the central Kraken. The Dread-Fiend picks up the left loot token.
I’m sorry my crabby children!
Once all the sizzling and crunching has subsided, the crabs have taken damage but weathered the first wave. Fiend’s deal 8 damage to Heartpiercers, Spectres pour 7 damage into the central Hearpiercers, the Mind-Screech and Horror lightning the Centurion for 3 damage, and the Kraken take 1 and 5 respectively. Everybody keeps their cool, placidly blinking in crab. The Planar Apparition heals a couple damage off the Spectres.
Trident 2: I decimate my clock figuring out what to do in the center, and end up sidestepping the Placoderms against the building so they can’t be triple charged, offering up the wounded Heartpiercers, and preparing the Water Elementals to go to work against anything that engages. The other Placoderms flank the Butchers fighting the Kraken, the central Kraken prepares to clear out some Phantoms and prepare for incoming terrors, and the Eternal on the left helps out with the Fiends, tho he contemplates leaving them to their fate and sprinting for the Dread-Fiend (and loot) on the hill. Oh, and the Centurion jukes forward to shut down the Mind-Screech.
The Trident of the Drowned Sea, plus a bunch of Heartpiercer shots, bleeds the Mind-Screech to 7 damage (and disorders it). Bastion goes on the Placoderms by the house. In combat, the Eternal (and maybe some Heartpiercers) chunk 5 damage on the Fiends on the left. The Kraken and Placo flank on the right does 2 damage to those Butchers because they’re all hindered and/or idiots. The central Kraken does wreck those Phantoms at last and turn to face his new cuddle buddies.
Nightstalkers 3: The monstrous center ends up seeing the Shadow-Hulk and Butchers combo-charge the Placoderms, the Terror wades into the wounded Heartpiercers (picking up the central loot token in the process), and the Mind-Screech float into the Centurion. It only occurs to me now that he might have been angling to pop him and overrun into the Placoderm flank? The Centurion is a brick, but he is on 3 damage … The Fiends counter the Heartpiercers on the left and the Butchers hit the Kraken on the right.
Both Heartpiercers are devoured, as are the Placoderms. RIP lads. The central Kraken takes 7 damage from shooting (and is frozen by the Planar Apparition’s breath), shortly before the right Kraken is pushed to 4 damage by his Butchers. The Mind-Screech successfully bops the Centurion, turning his laser trident off 😦
Trident 3: I really do not want to fight the Terror if I can help it, so the Water Elemental horde goes into the central Butchers and the Kraken sees how fast he can tear down the Spectre horde – rampage don’t fail me now! On the left, the Dread-Fiend has wandered into charge range of the Eternal, so he absolutely leaps on the chance to carve that loot out of her talons. Otherwise stuff counter-charges on the right, including the Centurion into the Mind-Screech for murder purposes but also to disorder it.
Bastion goes up on the Water Elemental horde, what shooting there is misses the Horror and just tickles the Planar Apparition. In combat, the Eternal gets started on the Dread-Fiend, the Water Elemental does a sizable 6 to the Butchers, the central Kraken gentle cuddles the Spectres to 6 damage, the Centurion routs the Mind-Screech, and the right Butchers succumb to their crustacean executioners.
Nightstalkers 4: The Terror ejects its loot and oozes through the woods into a fresh batch of Heartpiercers as the Butchers counter-charge the Water Elementals. The Fiends round the house and the Shadow-Hulk prepares to slayer the Kraken if he can’t carve through these damn Spectres first (who also counter the Kraken this turn). The Dread-Fiend counters the Eternal, and the Planar Apparition picks up the central loot.
The Spectres are healed down to 1 damage by the Planar Apparition (!), and then a lot of damage is spread around. The Eternal takes 2, the Water Elemental horde takes 8, the central Kraken takes 5 (!), and the Terror chomps 7 into the Heartpiercers. What a grind y’all.
Trident 4: The Nightstalkers have left some flanks open, which I capitalize on: Kraken into the flank of the Spectres, Placoderm into the flank of the Terror (hindered but picking up the token). The other Kraken disengages and faces the Shadow-Hulk, less because I trust the other Kraken and more because I expect the Krakens to flub and I want to point ensnare at the monster killing titan. Water Elementals and Eternal counter-charge their dancing partners.
The Centurion spikes 1 damage into the Planar Apparition, sitting it down, and the bastion Envoy bastions himself for great straddling justice. The highlight of combat is the Water Elemental horde ending the Butchers; it stays where it is to face the oncoming Fiends. The Kraken flank into the Spectres yields 14 damage and I think a waver, while the Terror wears its 6 damage without concern, and the Eternal fails to waver/rout the Dread-Fiend.
Nightstalkers 5: Even. More. Fighting. The Fiends make crabfall with the Water Elementals (who are on 6 damage with Rally (1)), the Shadow-Hulk does front charge the waiting Kraken, with Planar Apparition in the flank, and the Dread-Fiend and Terror counter-charge.
The Shadow-Hulk and Planar Apparition drop an 18/20 Kraken on 3 damage! And the Fiends likewise slam right through the -/18 Water Elementals. The Terror finishes off its second unit of Heartpiercers, turning to face the Placoderms, and the Dread-Fiend wavers the Eternal. But he’s got fury, everyone, we still got this.
Trident 5: The surviving Kraken charges the Planar Apparition to end its reign of terror / steal its loot, moments after the Centurion charged the Shadow-Hulk to hold it in place mere inches from the Kraken’s flank. The Placoderms charge the Terror (hindered :X) and the Eternal fury counter-charges the Dread-Fiend. Bastion goes on the Kraken.
The last of the Heartpiercers shoot down the Spectre horde, putting the MVP to bed at last. The Kraken enjoys some bastion, before completely whiffing on the Planar Apparition (listen, ensnare sucks). The Centurion however beasts 4 damage into the Shadow-Hulk. The Eternal likewise chunks the Dread-Fiend but again even a waver eludes me. The Placoderms somehow get the Terror to 4 damage, despite 6+ to hit, but that thing has been regening like a thing that regens (4+). Rude.
Nightstalkers 6: The game is drawing to a close but the slaughter is sill raging. The pathfinding Fiends flank the Placoderms with the Terror in the front, the Planar Apparition counters the Kraken, the Shadow-Hulk the Centurion, and the Dread-Fiend the Eternal.
The Placoderms shatter, with their loot absorbed into the Terror’s gooey folds. Looks like everybody else pulled through tho.
Trident 6: With 4 minutes left on my clock, I’m desperately hoping the last of my smashy dudes can fight their way out of this mess.
I furiously roll dice for 3 minutes but I just can’t drop the Planar Apparition or the Dread-Fiend, tho the latter finally wavers. With no turn 7 and with 3 tokens to 0, that’s a …

NIGHTSTALKER VICTORY (3-18)

So close to a 6-15 if only the Eternal could ever pass that rout test and grab the Dread-Fiend’s loot! It was quite the game, where I felt weirdly in control and yet totally behind the eyeball the entire time. If I had to blame something, I’m content to blame my Nv dice, which were horrendous when I needed them to spike to keep my momentum up. Jason would go on to make an unexpected run for the top table.

UP NEXT: Basileans!

SCUTTLIN’ REALM 22: FORCES OF THE ABYSS

Second game of the first day and I’m up against Bill, a new local player who picked up Kings of War late last year. He’s got a largely Mantic Abyssals army with a pair of enormous worms for his Fiends, which I’m 100% here for and look forward to wrassling with.

Forces of the Abyss 2100
Molochs Horde – Despoiler Champ, Sacrificial Imp, Blade of Slashing
Abyssal Ghouls Horde
Abyssal Ghouls Horde
Abyssal Horsemen Regiment – Staying Stone
Flamebearers Troop
Flamebearers Troop
Gargoyles Troop
Abyssal Fiend
Abyssal Fiend

Manifestation of Ba’el – Lightning Bolt (7)
Despoiler Champion
Zaz’u’szu the Betrayer – Lightning Bolt (4+), Bane Chant (2+)
Abyssal Warlock – Alchemist Curse (2)

Looks the business to me, although he wasn’t sold on Zaz’u’szu. I’ve only seen him used in batreps myself, but then Abyssals is one of those armies where I tend to just face them at tournaments. Maybe not any longer, welcome to the scene Bill!

Second scenario is Control, with me making the Abyssals go first, largely to mess with his Flamebearers.

BATTLE: GAME 2

Battlelines!
Abyssals 1: The demonic line pushes forward in the middle, hampered by terrain on the left, while the Abyssal Horsemen rapidly redeploy away from the crabby right flank. Lightning strikes some Heartpiercers with no significant impact (apart from 6 damage).
Trident 1: Crustaceans scuttle forth in response, using the Abyssal retreat on the right to push hard down that flank. Harpoons rout a Flamebearer unit, skewer Ba’el for 3 damage and the war-bow Envoy tags the left Abyssal Fiend (WAR-BOW). Bastion goes up on the rapidly regenerating Heartpiercers (down to 2).
Abyssals 2: The bulk of the Abyssals continue trudging through the terrain down the center of the board, as the Horsemen have a change of heart and face the oncoming crabs on the right. Significantly more fire is brought to bear this turn, wavering Heartpiercers on the left (6 damage) and wounding the Depth Horror Eternal (3 damage) and right Placoderms (2 damage). Zaz’u has started to significantly hurt his Gargoyle battery at this point (7 damage) as well!
Trident 2: The sound of the grind revving up can be heard as the right Kraken is released upon the poor Abyssal Horsemen, smashing 5 damage into them. The right Placoderms make contact with Zaz’u, pinching 4 damage into him. The Eternal charges the right Ghouls horde to block them up (2 damage caused), shortly after Heartpiercers stick 2 more damage into Ba’el and lucky waver the big bad! Also the other Flamebearers start to take Heartpiercer damage and the war-bow Envoy tags that Abyssal Fiend again (WAR-BOW)!
Abyssals 3: We’re getting danger close now! The Eternal takes a combo-charge from Ghouls and Abyssal Fiend, while the right Kraken is countered by his Horsemen. The other significant movement is the Molochs moving to reinforce the right flank, but otherwise it’s murder time.
The wounded Heartpiercers on the left are dunked by the Abyssal Fiend and/or Flamebearers and/or Warlock, and some combination of those also does 4 damage to the left Kraken. In combat, the Eternal takes 8 damage and wavers (with bastion on him), while the right Kraken goes up to 7 damage and wavers on a 10+. Touche, Abyssals, touche.
Trident 3: Crabs up the ante this turn, diving into combat across the board. Placoderms charge the left Ghoul horde, and the other Ghoul horde is flanked by a Kraken and fronted by the Water Elemental horde. The Eternal fury counters the right Abyssal Fiend, the right Placoderms aim to pop the betrayed Gargoyles, and the right Kraken furiously regens in place. Real Talk: I need a couple of these combats to go my way or I’m in a bad place. I mean, they totally should, but anything can and will happen with my dice 😐
The Centurion spikes Zaz’u off the board with his laser trident, removing the Gargoyles inspiring and helping the Placoderms rend the stony bird girls to gravel and face the Molochs. The central Ghoul horde is evaporated, allowing the left Kraken to reform out of the left Abyssal Fiend’s LOS and seriously menace the Abyssal lines, along with the Water Elemental horde. In other news, Ba’el takes a couple damage from Heartpiercers (bad dice!), the left Fiend is shot to 6 damage, and the left Ghoul horde snipped to 5 damage. The Eternal must have hacked some damage into his Fiend too.
Abyssals 4: Ba’el kicks things off by diving some Heartpiercers far away from the giant crabs staring at him, comboing with the Despoiler Champion. The Molochs hit the right Placoderms, the left Fiend helps the Ghoul horde out with the other Placos, and the right Fiend counters the Eternal. Shooters in the center prepare to waver or kill the central Kraken.
And waver him they do, rolling that spicy 8-9. In fact, everything the Abyssals touch wavers this turn – EVERYTHING. My scuttlin’ realm for a fury aura!
Trident 4: You know what isn’t wavered? The Water Elemental horde charging the rear of the Molochs 😬 Also the Centurion, who hits the Horsemen to help the Kraken grind them out, since the big guy keeps wavering. Loads of regening happens as well.
The Molochs are brutalized, the Water Elementals turning to eat an Abyssal Fiend next turn. Heartpiercer shooting punches more damage on the left Abyssal Fiend (9 total I think) and a little more on Ba’el. Bastion goes up on the central Kraken.
Abyssals 5: The left Placoderms are again charged by Ghouls and Abyssal Fiend, as the Centurion is countered by the Horsemen and the Eternal prepares to be eaten by his Fiend. Ba’el disengages from the Heartpiercers, preparing to style on me, tho the Despoiler Champ charges them again.
Kings of Hills: The Revenge
Instead of shooting or fighting, Ba’el shouts ‘From the Pit I Curse Thee!’, disordering both Heartpiercer units and the bastion Envoy! Bravo. In more violent news, the left Placos are once more wavered in combat, as is the central Kraken from shooting. WTH. The Eternal falls to the right Fiend, the Centurion takes some damage and the Despoiler Champ nibbles on its Heartpiercers.
Trident 5: Crabby vengeance will be ours! The Water Elementals and Placoderms plow into the Eternal’s Abyssal Fiend, as Centurion and Kraken hit the Horsemen, and Heartpiercers go aggro on Ba’el’s flank and the Despoiler Champ’s front. The wavered Placoderms disengage and the Kraken furiously regenerates (9 of 9 damage!)
Horsemen and Abyssal Fiend are routed, but no such luck elsewhere, with token damage at best from the Heartpiercers (although that left Fiend is at like 10+ damage now).
Abyssals 6: With his mind on the scenario, the Abyssal general eases up on the gas on the left and jockeys units into zones. Ba’el and the Despoiler Champ however do hit those Heartpiercers in the bottom right again.
And dunk them pretty hard. Alchemist curse from the Warlock pressure cooks the right Placoderms as well (and was doing a number on the central Kraken all game).
Trident 6: Things are pretty well in hand (claw) for me, especially once the central Kraken eats those Flamebearer’s in his sector. Some other violence happens, but the Ghouls hold and the Water Elementals can’t finish of Ba’el. Check out that clock at this point, with Bill up 20+ minutes over me 😀
Abyssals 7: The Ghouls overwhem the Placoderm, taking the lower left sector from my Heartpiercers. The Water Elemental thankfully holds Ba’el and the Despoiler Champ in place.

Trident 7: I melt the last fragment of my clock thinking about where to put the central Kraken, in the end deciding to gamble on shooting the Warlock and getting +2 points rather than walking into the upper left for a sure +1 point and then possibly denying him a point. The Centurion does not drop the Warlock, however the Water Elemental horde sends Ba’el screaming back to the pit with my last seconds of clock, which is always a good feel. With 3 sectors to the Abyss’ 1, this is another …

SCUTTLIN’ VICTORY (15-6)

I came close to getting an 18-3 on this and sort of gave it away on a gamble, but whatever, it was great to play Bill and I look forward to more games with him. His indecision with the Abyssal Horsemen early game was saved by hot waver dice keeping the right Kraken from rampaging his line, but then that Moloch rear was pretty catastrophic and let the Water Elementals decimate his hammers into the late game. Mad props on using Ba’el’s Curse all the same!

UP NEXT: Nightstalkers!

SCUTTLIN’ REALM 21: ELVES

The last weekend of February 2022 was the inaugural Dead of Winter GT held by my club here in Albany, NY. By all accounts it was a thrilling success, and I certainly had a great time getting five solid games of Kings of War in while also being able to get some sleep Friday and Saturday night. Sure, I drank considerably less and played none of the usual board games with the lads, but life is full of tradeoffs. On to the tournament report!

Trident Realm 2100
Water Elementals Horde – Brew of Strength
Placoderms Regiment
Placoderms Regiment
Naiad Heartpiercers Regiment
Naiad Heartpiercers Regiment
Naiad Heartpiercers Regiment
Naiad Heartpiercers Regiment
Kraken
Kraken

Naiad Centurion – Trident of the Drowned Sea
Depth Horror Eternal
Naiad Envoy – Bastion (2)
Naiad Envoy – War-Bow of Kaba

The crabs came out of hibernation, saw my old double Gigas rebased to double Placoderms, and I finally finished up my Centurion, giving him the shiny new shooting attak to help him in his mission to mess with every big flyer he could get his claw on. Didn’t have high hopes for my performance but great to see the tiny/huge lads together again. Somewhat unexpectedly, I was the only Trident player!

Elves 2100
Forest Shamblers Horde – Brew of Strength
Stormwind Cavalry Regiment – Quicksilver Lancers, Potion of the Caterpillar
Stormwind Cavalry Regiment – Helm of Confidence
Palace Guard Regiment – Banner of Eternal Darkness
Kindred Gladestalkers Regiment – Fire-Oil
Kindred Gladestalkers Regiment
Silverbreeze Cavalry Troop – Piercing Arrow
Hunters of the Wild Troop – Blood of the Old King
Hunters of the Wild Troop

Tydarion Dragonlord
Elven Archmage – Inspiring Talisman; Surge (8), Lightning Bolt (5)
Elven Archmage – The Boomstick; Lightning Bolt (7)

Speaking of coming out of hibernation … I haven’t played Jim since Fantasy times, if ever, but I’ve seen him at the various events he runs in the Northeast. Certainly a welcome first opponent, even if Tydarion gave me pause. Now that is a dragon! The rest of the list seemed solid: meaningful shooting, solid fast hammers, handful of competent chaff pieces.

First scenario is Pillage, with the Elves going first, either because they wanted to or because I made them.

BATTLE: GAME 1

Elves 0: Trees scout up!
Elves 1: The loathesome Elves sally forth into shooting range on the left or shelter behind their screens on the right. The Quicksilver Lancers advance slightly ahead of their cohorts, no doubt preparing for nimble shenanigans / because there was a wood to prance through (they have the gold banner).
The Gladestalkers, especially the fire oil unit, pin cushion the uninspired Heartpiercers on the left, routing them for first blood. Elsewhere lightning strikes the non-regenerating Depth Horror Eternal for 3 damage.
Trident 1: The crabs scuttle forth, preparing for violence on the right and suffering some trepidation on the left. The leftmost Placoderms begin their long, long trek through those woods 😐
The fire oil Gladestalkers to the left take token harpoon damage but hold fine. The blood Hunters of the Wild on the right (slip of paper unit) take significant damage from Heartpiercers and the Centurion, but the low rout test is frustratingly failed. The Water Elemental horde (giant crab) enjoys the cool caress of bastion as it awaits the violence.
Elves 2: Gladestalkers back up on the left as their Forest Shamblers power forward into long surge range of the left Kraken. On the right, Hunters of the Wild charge Heartpiercers and Kraken to clear the way for the Quicksilver Lancers into the Water Elemental horde. Tydarion looms.
The Gladestalkers chunk 5 damage into the left Kraken, before the Forest Shamblers fail their ~7″ surge by a couple inches. Importantly, they’re blocking the Kraken’s ability to pivot and go ham into the Gladestalkers next turn. On the right, the Depth Horror Eternal is wavered by lightning, and shortly afterwards the blood Hunters waver their Heartpiercers (taking even more damage from the blood of the old king), the Water Elemental cops 10 damage and holds, and the other Kraken takes token damage from its Hunters.
Trident 2: Crabs join the grind, as is their want. On the left, the Kraken charges the Forest Shamblers, unable to skirt past them, but also protecting the surviving Heartpiercers in the process, who advance to keep the fire oil Gladestalkers in their range (coping a -1 to hit in the process). On the right, Placoderms hit the disintegrating blood Hunters, the Water Elementals counter the Lancers, and the Kraken counters the other Hunters. The Centurion meanwhile limbers up and prepares to sit a dragonlord down. Also there’s a lot of regening.
Damage is liberally applied to the Elf army, including the Stormwind on the hill soaking Heartpiercer shooting, but only the blood Hunters are vanquished. Yes, the right Kraken barely tickled its Hunters. Tydarion however is successfully tagged by the Trident of the Drowned Sea and disordered 😤
Elves 3: The filthy Gladestalkers back up on the left and the Archmages hover about, however the rest of the Elves put their natural inclinations aside and join combat. Of note are the Stormwind charging the Placoderms, despite their phalanx, and Tydarion galloping his dragon into the waiting claw of the Centurion.
Kings of the Hill, more like!
The Gladestalkers claim the other Heartpiercers on the left, and the Archmages flash-fry the Depth Horror Eternal with their 13 lightning shots. In combat, the Heartpiercers on the hill are blended by the Palace Guard, but all the other crabs weather the Elven attention, including the Centurion parrying Tydarion down to 5 damage and holding. (You’ll see a waver marker on him, but Jim’s math was better than mine, he actually missed wavering by 1, even with brutal.)
Trident 3: The Placoderms on the left escape the tyranny of the woods, now free to advance menacingly on the Gladestalkers shooting their friends. Krakens, Elementals and Centurion regenerate and counter-charge their dancing partners, while the central Placoderms simply counter-charge.
The war-bow Envoy routs the fire-oil Gladestalkers (GO WAR-BOW!), the last of the Heartpiercers shoot the Palace Guard point blank, and bastion goes up on the central Placoderms, then crab-flavored vengeance is served to both the Quicksilver Lancers and the last of the Hunters of the Wild. The Centurion grounds Tydarion once more, and the central Placos continue nibbling at their Stormwind.
Elves 4: The Gladestalkers can’t escape their Placoderm executioners, so prepare to make them pay along with the Archmages. Everybody else counter-charges or charges in the case of the Palace Guard into the Water Elemental horde (which has 6 damage). Also, the Silverbreeze exist on a point back there.
Apart from the Centurion being eaten by a mega dragon, the crabs are once again able to soak the Elven aggression. Of note is the Placoderms on the left taking 4 damage – without heal, every pip counts and they’ve got plenty of work to do still.
Trident 4: Speaking of Placoderms going to work, the left regiment scuttles into the remaining Gladestalkers at long last. The right Kraken powers gleefully into Tydarion, and the three ongoing combats grind on.
The Gladestalkers are dismembered by the Placoderms, their delicate Elven limbs gribbled up by horrible crabby mouths. Everything else is a slog – Tydarion is grounded by a Kraken, and the Palace Guard waver. The Heartpiercers punched some damage into the surge Archmage, out of spite.
Elves 5: The Forest Shamblers, Swordwind and Tydarion all counter-charge. Meanwhile, the Palace Guard disengage so the Water Elemental horde can be dealt with by the Silverbreeze …
… which they do, dropping the big crab with just their puny bows. The Archmages combine electrical powers again, wavering the Heartpiercers. The Swordwind also turn on, pushing the central Placoderms to 9 damage and wavering them as well. The Kraken, however, are resolute.
Trident 5: The Placoderms on the left menace the Forest Shamblers and prepare to grab a point, while I prepare to lose the center. Tydarion is however comfortably within routing distance now, if the right Kraken can just do a couple damage.
Sadly, the big goofus can’t land a single wound, meaning Tydarion is free to fly away after all that work 😦 The other Kraken is vaguely more competent, finishing off his Shamblers after 4! turns of swinging at them.
Elves 6: Tydarion Dragonlord flits away to go breath on Heartpiercers, while the Swordwind charges the central Placos (who still have phalanx despite the waver :P)
Hill update!
Skewered and/or smoked, the crabby center crumbles at last.
Trident 6: Buuuut both Kraken are alive and well, and are swiftly unleashed into the rear of the Swordwind (!) and the front of the Silverbreeze. The Placoderms claim a point at the war-bow Envoy prepares for glory.
No dice on that war-bow, but the cavalry are messily slaughtered by towering crab titans, which certainly feels nice. With no Turn 7 and 3 objectives to 1, this is a solid …

SCUTTLIN’ VICTORY (15-6)

While the grind on this first game was very real, I was happy to take that over getting shot and lightning bolted more than I had to be. It was great to play Jim at last / after so long, and a nice way to be eased into Elves post-COK22. I really wish I could have dropped Tydarion, but I’m not going to complain too hard after neutering maybe the biggest dragon in the game for almost an entire game 😀

UP NEXT: Abyssals!