SCUTTLIN’ REALM 21: ELVES

The last weekend of February 2022 was the inaugural Dead of Winter GT held by my club here in Albany, NY. By all accounts it was a thrilling success, and I certainly had a great time getting five solid games of Kings of War in while also being able to get some sleep Friday and Saturday night. Sure, I drank considerably less and played none of the usual board games with the lads, but life is full of tradeoffs. On to the tournament report!

Trident Realm 2100
Water Elementals Horde – Brew of Strength
Placoderms Regiment
Placoderms Regiment
Naiad Heartpiercers Regiment
Naiad Heartpiercers Regiment
Naiad Heartpiercers Regiment
Naiad Heartpiercers Regiment
Kraken
Kraken

Naiad Centurion – Trident of the Drowned Sea
Depth Horror Eternal
Naiad Envoy – Bastion (2)
Naiad Envoy – War-Bow of Kaba

The crabs came out of hibernation, saw my old double Gigas rebased to double Placoderms, and I finally finished up my Centurion, giving him the shiny new shooting attak to help him in his mission to mess with every big flyer he could get his claw on. Didn’t have high hopes for my performance but great to see the tiny/huge lads together again. Somewhat unexpectedly, I was the only Trident player!

Elves 2100
Forest Shamblers Horde – Brew of Strength
Stormwind Cavalry Regiment – Quicksilver Lancers, Potion of the Caterpillar
Stormwind Cavalry Regiment – Helm of Confidence
Palace Guard Regiment – Banner of Eternal Darkness
Kindred Gladestalkers Regiment – Fire-Oil
Kindred Gladestalkers Regiment
Silverbreeze Cavalry Troop – Piercing Arrow
Hunters of the Wild Troop – Blood of the Old King
Hunters of the Wild Troop

Tydarion Dragonlord
Elven Archmage – Inspiring Talisman; Surge (8), Lightning Bolt (5)
Elven Archmage – The Boomstick; Lightning Bolt (7)

Speaking of coming out of hibernation … I haven’t played Jim since Fantasy times, if ever, but I’ve seen him at the various events he runs in the Northeast. Certainly a welcome first opponent, even if Tydarion gave me pause. Now that is a dragon! The rest of the list seemed solid: meaningful shooting, solid fast hammers, handful of competent chaff pieces.

First scenario is Pillage, with the Elves going first, either because they wanted to or because I made them.

BATTLE: GAME 1

Elves 0: Trees scout up!
Elves 1: The loathesome Elves sally forth into shooting range on the left or shelter behind their screens on the right. The Quicksilver Lancers advance slightly ahead of their cohorts, no doubt preparing for nimble shenanigans / because there was a wood to prance through (they have the gold banner).
The Gladestalkers, especially the fire oil unit, pin cushion the uninspired Heartpiercers on the left, routing them for first blood. Elsewhere lightning strikes the non-regenerating Depth Horror Eternal for 3 damage.
Trident 1: The crabs scuttle forth, preparing for violence on the right and suffering some trepidation on the left. The leftmost Placoderms begin their long, long trek through those woods 😐
The fire oil Gladestalkers to the left take token harpoon damage but hold fine. The blood Hunters of the Wild on the right (slip of paper unit) take significant damage from Heartpiercers and the Centurion, but the low rout test is frustratingly failed. The Water Elemental horde (giant crab) enjoys the cool caress of bastion as it awaits the violence.
Elves 2: Gladestalkers back up on the left as their Forest Shamblers power forward into long surge range of the left Kraken. On the right, Hunters of the Wild charge Heartpiercers and Kraken to clear the way for the Quicksilver Lancers into the Water Elemental horde. Tydarion looms.
The Gladestalkers chunk 5 damage into the left Kraken, before the Forest Shamblers fail their ~7″ surge by a couple inches. Importantly, they’re blocking the Kraken’s ability to pivot and go ham into the Gladestalkers next turn. On the right, the Depth Horror Eternal is wavered by lightning, and shortly afterwards the blood Hunters waver their Heartpiercers (taking even more damage from the blood of the old king), the Water Elemental cops 10 damage and holds, and the other Kraken takes token damage from its Hunters.
Trident 2: Crabs join the grind, as is their want. On the left, the Kraken charges the Forest Shamblers, unable to skirt past them, but also protecting the surviving Heartpiercers in the process, who advance to keep the fire oil Gladestalkers in their range (coping a -1 to hit in the process). On the right, Placoderms hit the disintegrating blood Hunters, the Water Elementals counter the Lancers, and the Kraken counters the other Hunters. The Centurion meanwhile limbers up and prepares to sit a dragonlord down. Also there’s a lot of regening.
Damage is liberally applied to the Elf army, including the Stormwind on the hill soaking Heartpiercer shooting, but only the blood Hunters are vanquished. Yes, the right Kraken barely tickled its Hunters. Tydarion however is successfully tagged by the Trident of the Drowned Sea and disordered 😤
Elves 3: The filthy Gladestalkers back up on the left and the Archmages hover about, however the rest of the Elves put their natural inclinations aside and join combat. Of note are the Stormwind charging the Placoderms, despite their phalanx, and Tydarion galloping his dragon into the waiting claw of the Centurion.
Kings of the Hill, more like!
The Gladestalkers claim the other Heartpiercers on the left, and the Archmages flash-fry the Depth Horror Eternal with their 13 lightning shots. In combat, the Heartpiercers on the hill are blended by the Palace Guard, but all the other crabs weather the Elven attention, including the Centurion parrying Tydarion down to 5 damage and holding. (You’ll see a waver marker on him, but Jim’s math was better than mine, he actually missed wavering by 1, even with brutal.)
Trident 3: The Placoderms on the left escape the tyranny of the woods, now free to advance menacingly on the Gladestalkers shooting their friends. Krakens, Elementals and Centurion regenerate and counter-charge their dancing partners, while the central Placoderms simply counter-charge.
The war-bow Envoy routs the fire-oil Gladestalkers (GO WAR-BOW!), the last of the Heartpiercers shoot the Palace Guard point blank, and bastion goes up on the central Placoderms, then crab-flavored vengeance is served to both the Quicksilver Lancers and the last of the Hunters of the Wild. The Centurion grounds Tydarion once more, and the central Placos continue nibbling at their Stormwind.
Elves 4: The Gladestalkers can’t escape their Placoderm executioners, so prepare to make them pay along with the Archmages. Everybody else counter-charges or charges in the case of the Palace Guard into the Water Elemental horde (which has 6 damage). Also, the Silverbreeze exist on a point back there.
Apart from the Centurion being eaten by a mega dragon, the crabs are once again able to soak the Elven aggression. Of note is the Placoderms on the left taking 4 damage – without heal, every pip counts and they’ve got plenty of work to do still.
Trident 4: Speaking of Placoderms going to work, the left regiment scuttles into the remaining Gladestalkers at long last. The right Kraken powers gleefully into Tydarion, and the three ongoing combats grind on.
The Gladestalkers are dismembered by the Placoderms, their delicate Elven limbs gribbled up by horrible crabby mouths. Everything else is a slog – Tydarion is grounded by a Kraken, and the Palace Guard waver. The Heartpiercers punched some damage into the surge Archmage, out of spite.
Elves 5: The Forest Shamblers, Swordwind and Tydarion all counter-charge. Meanwhile, the Palace Guard disengage so the Water Elemental horde can be dealt with by the Silverbreeze …
… which they do, dropping the big crab with just their puny bows. The Archmages combine electrical powers again, wavering the Heartpiercers. The Swordwind also turn on, pushing the central Placoderms to 9 damage and wavering them as well. The Kraken, however, are resolute.
Trident 5: The Placoderms on the left menace the Forest Shamblers and prepare to grab a point, while I prepare to lose the center. Tydarion is however comfortably within routing distance now, if the right Kraken can just do a couple damage.
Sadly, the big goofus can’t land a single wound, meaning Tydarion is free to fly away after all that work 😦 The other Kraken is vaguely more competent, finishing off his Shamblers after 4! turns of swinging at them.
Elves 6: Tydarion Dragonlord flits away to go breath on Heartpiercers, while the Swordwind charges the central Placos (who still have phalanx despite the waver :P)
Hill update!
Skewered and/or smoked, the crabby center crumbles at last.
Trident 6: Buuuut both Kraken are alive and well, and are swiftly unleashed into the rear of the Swordwind (!) and the front of the Silverbreeze. The Placoderms claim a point at the war-bow Envoy prepares for glory.
No dice on that war-bow, but the cavalry are messily slaughtered by towering crab titans, which certainly feels nice. With no Turn 7 and 3 objectives to 1, this is a solid …

SCUTTLIN’ VICTORY (15-6)

While the grind on this first game was very real, I was happy to take that over getting shot and lightning bolted more than I had to be. It was great to play Jim at last / after so long, and a nice way to be eased into Elves post-COK22. I really wish I could have dropped Tydarion, but I’m not going to complain too hard after neutering maybe the biggest dragon in the game for almost an entire game 😀

UP NEXT: Abyssals!

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